When I first came to Shevat, no one distrusted
me more than Khan! After what Solaris had
done to his son, and Miang to his wife, one
can hardly blame him. Unlike most of the
Shevites, however, he eventually did come
to accept me as a colleague. Perhaps discovering
that I was Guardian Angel of Solaris as he
was of Shevat aided the process.
I later accompanied Kahn when he went to search for Fei... or, perhaps I should say Id. When we at last found him in Elru, the destruction we witnessed is in truth like nothing I have ever seen - even the devastation wrought by Deus was not as terrifying to behold, as it was so much more impersonal. I am more amazed that there was even a single survivor of the Elru people than that there was only one.
Kahn and I fought and defeated Grahf in Elru. It was after this that Kahn took Fei away, to what we hoped would be safety. Had we returned Fei to Shevat, the Elders would surely have insisted on his being placed in carbon freeze, which we were not willing to do. We never suspected that Grahf would be able to find Fei again two years later. This was the first of two times when I let down my guard where Grahf was concerned - the second was in Lahan Village. Perhaps it was impossible for mere mortals, no matter how powerful, to truly understand the mind of one who had lived on anger for five hundred years, but I still regret the mistakes I made in those days.
Although I, like all Shevites, respected
Master Khan as our greatest warrior, I was
frantic when Hyu went with him to try to
find the Contact. I just couldn't seem to
shake off a terrible sense of foreboding.
For one thing, for most of our years together,
Hyuga's position had not required him to
engage in actual combat, and although I knew
he was renowned as Solaris' finest warrior,
I feared for him.
On a more selfish note, Hyu and I hadn't been apart from the time he had first come to Shevat!
And then, just when I had convinced myself that the two Guardian Angels would have no trouble dealing with whatever would dare to challenge them, I learned I was pregnant! Which, of course, made me miss Hyu even more...
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